Groggy gratitude

Ok, here I am in the hospital, a little groggy still and drugged up. Let’s see if I can write!

Funniest hospital story so far. They took me into the prep/recovery room to set me up with the IV and give me the pre-op meds that make me sleepy. The next thing I knew, I was in the recovery room with eyelids so heavy I thought I could never open them again and a band around my chest that made breathing a little hard. I was knocked out most of the day yesterday, sleeping and sleeping and sleeping. The doctors think it’s because it was my first time under a general. (None of this is the funny part--here it comes).

Dr Keith, my anesthetist, came in to check on me in the room yesterday afternoon. He said, “That was a cool conversation we had in the theater. We all talked about it after the surgery too and we’ve all checked out your book and everything.”

I told him I don’t remember anything out of the prep room and he laughed. “Well, you commented on how well we were acting as a team and pointed to some of the features of that and we all talked about your book.”

I said all this? I tried and tried to remember, but nothing!

He said it was complementary and helpful and they appreciated what I said! How’s that for funny? I was doing team work even though I was almost unconscious! I guess I really do love my job.

I got back into my room, eyelids still heavy, and heard the messages of love and goodwill people have sent. All I can think about is what a charmed life I lead—now hopefully a cancer-free charmed life. But I really could feel you all cheering me on and I think your prayers or songs or dances or meditations really did wonderful work for me.

I am recovering well. They like my progress. I’m in very little pain now—just pretty sore. Last night they gave me medicine that made me super nauseous and then they gave me medicine to take the nausea away! They didn’t have to give me a sleeping pill because even though I slept all day, I slept most of the night as well.

Now is the time for healing. I feel so excited that the cancer is out even though I’m sad about losing a breast. Stan says it’ll all be better than it was and I trust him to get it right. Two more nights in the hospital and then Stan will “unveil” my new breasts and see what I think of them. I wondered whether there would be champagne and canapés but he said no, just the two of us for the unveiling.

So, for those of you who are worried about me, be soothed. I am amazingly cheerful and delighted here in this hospital room. People are being really nice to me. They are medicating my pain well. It’s lovely to hang out with Michael and his friend. I feel grateful to have found the lump and had it removed along with other tissue that was going to threaten my life. I feel grateful that the Cultivating Leadership crowd are meeting and loving each other and eating my cheesecake in my house with my kids. I feel grateful that the sun is out today. I think I might be the luckiest woman in the world.

I hope each of you can take a few minutes and breathe in the gratitude for your situation. We are all so amazingly fortunate. More from me later…